THIS MATERIAL MAY NOT BE SUITABLE FOR THOSE UNDER 18.
So if you are under 18, a right wing republican christian or anyone else who is offended by nudity, vulgarity and/or a wanton disrespect for societal norms, consider yourself warned and leave. Oh and might I add, "If thine eyes offend thee, PLUCK THEM OUT". Just don't complain!


~The more defects a man may have, the older he is, the less lovable, the more resounding his success.~
Marquis de Sade


"Allow me to be frank at the commencement. You will not like me. The gentlemen will be envious and the ladies will be repelled. You will not like me now and you will like me a good deal less as we go on. Ladies, an announcement: I am up for it, all the time. That is not a boast or an opinion, it is bone hard medical fact. I put it round you know. And you will watch me putting it round and sigh for it. Don't. It is a deal of trouble for you and you are better off watching and drawing your conclusions from a distance than you would be if I got my tarse up your petticoats. Gentlemen. Do not despair, I am up for that as well. And the same warning applies. Still your cheesy erections till I have had my say. But later when you shag - and later you will shag, I shall expect it of you and I will know if you have let me down - I wish you to shag with my homuncular image rattling in your gonads. Feel how it was for me, how it is for me and ponder. 'Was that shudder the same shudder he sensed? Did he know something more profound? Or is there some wall of wretchedness that we all batter with our heads at that shining, livelong moment. That is it. That is my prologue, nothing in rhyme, no protestations of modesty, you were not expecting that I hope. " from The Libertine and the bottom of Nic's dark soul.

There is in every madman a misunderstood genius whose idea, shining in his head, frightened people, and for whom delirium was the only solution to the strangulation that life had prepared for him.
~Antonin Artaud

I hurt myself today.....to see if i still feel......I focus on the pain......the only thing thats real......The needle tears a hole.....the old familiar sting........try to kill it all away..........but I remember everything........what have I become, my sweetest friend .........everyone i know, goes away in the end.......and you could have it all, my empire of dirt........I will let you down..........I will make you hurt..........I wear this crown of thorns.....upon my liars chair......full of broken thoughts.........I cannot repair..........beneath the stains of time........the feelings dissapear.......you are someone else..........I am still right here.........What have I become, my sweetest friend..........everyone I know, goes away in the end...........and you could have it all, my empire of dirt..........I will let you down............I will make you hurt...........if I could start again, a million miles away..........I will keep myself..........I would find a way.......NINE INCH NAILS







Monday, July 11, 2005
Pond Of Sorrow and Tears



Deep in the midst of a fog shrouded woods there was a meadow. In the center of the meadow there was pond so still that its waters acted as a mirror reflecting all that there was around it. No one knew how deep it was, and no one cared, for this wasn't a fishing pond or swimming pond. This was a pond made for reflecting and wishing; a pond where magic was said to happen.

Because the pond was so well known, many trails could be found leading from all directions through the fog shrouded woods and tall grasses that surrounded it's banks. Large rocks and fallen trees had become seats and pedestals for the many travelers who came to it's banks to meditate and wish. For all the activity around it (the coming and going of animals, insects and birds) the ponds waters were strangely still. No mater how strong the wind or powerful the rain; the pond did not show a ripple, it's waters remained like glass.

Many of the visitors who came were girls and women. The story was told that if they sat and peered into the mirror-like water; they would see the person they were to wed and spend eternity with. Thousands had come for this reason, generations had wed according to the pond's prediction. There was however one unwritten, but understood stipulation and that was that the seeker was entitled to only one vision of her future love.

Far from the pond was a kingdom called Plenty and there lived the Princess of Plenty. The Princess had made the journey to the pond many years before and saw in the water the Prince of Plenty. She did marry him as predicted. She had a castle, a carriage and everything that a Princess (or common woman) could want, but the Princess found something lacking. The Prince of Plenty had begun paying more attention to his kingdom and daily duties than he did to her. She at first missed his affection and attention, but soon resented him for the lack of love. She was showered with material gifts, but longed for the physical warmth and love she desired.

So it was that the Princess decided that the pond must have made a mistake in its prediction and that if that were the case she deserved another vision. She told the Prince that she was going to visit an old friend, but instead set out for the pond. Upon her arrival she found it just as before. The water was still and reflected the sky and everything around it. Ceremoniously she approached the pond and took a seat on a large stone close to it's edge. She peered into the water and explained her circumstances, but the pond remained still. She then said, "Please Pond show me the man I should have married!". She gazed into the ponds waters for what seemed like an eternity, but no vision came. Again she spoke, but this time in a more demanding manner, "Pond you were wrong before, and I married a man who can give me things, but does not give me love and warmth; now show me the man who will satisfy those desires and with whom I might spend eternity!" She then sat peering into the pond and waited for its reply.

As she looked the image of another man appeared. This man was older and dark; he was a stranger to her. "Who is he?", she asked. As if in reply a voice inside her head said, "He is the King of Woe." She was elated; her request had been granted, so it must mean that she was right about the pond's mistake. Now she knew she had to rid herself of the Prince of Plenty and wed the King of Woe. She returned to Plenty determined to right the wrong that had been done her.

She returned and immediately wrote to the King of Woe; she told him of her situation and the Pond's prediction. With the letter she sent a likeness of herself in hopes that this dark king would be drawn to her. She promised the King that when she left Plenty that she would have a suitable dowry. The message was sent and she began her wait, hoping that all she offered would be accepted by the King.

It wasn't long before a reply came. The King told her he "loved" what he saw in the likeness; that she aroused his desire. He understood her plight and desire and hoped as she did for a partner that he could share his life and kingdom with. The King then asked if she was sure that he was "the one", for he was decades older than the Princess and his Kingdom was unlike Plenty (in truth it was much poorer, but he was happy). He told her that if she decided that he truly was "the one" she sought, that he would do all in his power to make her happy.

His message filled her heart. She wasn't worried about his age or wealth, she had things, and when she left the Prince of Plenty would have money and all the castles wealth (it was hers she earned it). The King was offering what the Prince could not, his love and affection which would fulfill her fantasies. She couldn't wait to meet him and feel him around her; her passion was growing as she thought of him. She wrote him and told him how happy she was that her desires were shared; she requested a meeting. A date was set and when it came she told her Prince that she had to visit a friend who was in need of her company. She traveled to Woe and to the Kings castle. Though older than she; the princess found him attractive and vibrant. He found he soft, lovely and sensual. They immediately fell in love, and shared their hearts, minds and bodies.

When the time came to part their hearts became heavy in their chests. It was decided that she would return as often as possible until she could leave Plenty forever. Months passed and they wrote daily. They made plans, discussed dreams, and spoke of their love and bridled passions. When she wasn't writing she was surrounded by the Prince, her family and had her royal duties to perform. She attended many celebrations and functions which ultimately prohibited her from returning to Woe right away. With each message she promised to return soon.

One night a messenger came and told her that the King had been attacked in his Carriage and had been gravely injured. She sent a message telling him that she would come and tend his wounds. The messenger carried it back to his King, but the King declined her offer. He was in pain and he did not want to have her see him in this broken state. His castle had been lost and what little he had left had been stored in a barn. He had taken refuge with his ex-queen in her castle (the one which he had provided for her). He was trying to recover from his injuries, trying to recover his lost wealth and trying to save what was left of himself. His world had been changed and was not the one he had shown the Princess. Once healed he could begin again and rekindle the passions that he had felt.

Though the wound healed, it left a scar that was a daily reminder to him of how close he had come to his mortal end. The King began to work again; he filled his days with meetings and work and by night felt spent. The messages between the King and Princess became less frequent because of her duties and his work to regain his strength and his kingdom. When they did communicate she spoke of her newly acquired treasures, of her family and he spoke of his battles and his grief. There were not as many words of love and little talk of future encounters nor their future for that matter. He tried to assure her that time would remedy all, but time didn't.

Once again the Princess felt the Pond had shown her a false future. She felt the King paid her no more attention than the Prince did and now had even less to offer her. She sent him one last message regarding her disappointment and heart break. The King's only response was "I'm sorry". The Princess was grief stricken.

She returned to the Pond yet again. She knelt beside it and asked why it had yet again failed her. I came to you to find my life's partner, that one who would bring me happiness. This time she heard the Pond's response almost immediately. "I gave you the Prince of Plenty, but you were not satisfied. I then showed you the King of Woe, but even though you learned he could satisfy your need for warmth and love; it was not on your terms and you had no patience to "let time remedy" the problem. What would you have me do?" She then grew angry and challenged the Pond, "Show me that person who will make me happy and whom I am destined to spend eternity with!" The Pond told her to look deeply and she did. "Who do you see?" She peered into the Pond, but saw only her own reflection; "I see only myself", she said. The Pond's only response was, "Yes".

The Princess began to weep, understanding that only she was responsible for her happiness and that she would have to live with herself for ever. Her tears fell and broke the glassy surface of the water. Ripples began to appear all over the Ponds surface and soon all the reflected images were distorted and ugly. She wept for days, then weeks. As she wept the Pond grew wider and deeper until it swallowed her in its now salty waters.

Now, when people (most often women and young girls) talk about the pond  that is in the meadow surrounded by the fog shrouded forest; it is not about the happiness it brought to so many over the centuries. Now, they talk about the Princess who had Plenty, succumbed to Woe and drowned in the tears of her own self pity.

Posted at 04:15 pm by BondageMaster

Becca
July 12, 2005   12:09 PM PDT
 
Not much for fairy tales but that was a nice reminder that we are responsible for our own destiny. No man or woman or lottery or magic potion can make us happy. It is within ourselves.

(I just wrong something about that very subject on my blog - I could never drown in my own tears though. I have dry eyes. ha ha)

 

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My Extended Profile


I have been both a Master and Dom in the BDSM lifestyle for 40 years. I am currently in Sin City, (Las Vegas, Nevada), but I have plied my art all over the country and yes, the giving of pain and pleasure is an art.

I started this because I thought there might be an interaction between myself and like minded individuals, but found most willing to look and not speak; for this reason I have eliminated the tag board and your ability to comment (Consider yourself gagged).

My Blog has become a reflective self analysis and has enabled Me to vent. It has reflected on my childhood, BDSM and it has been a place to share poetry, stories, and art; all erotic in their own way

Having written here for over three years, I realized that I wanted this to be the home of My impure thoughts and deeds; I decided to create another home for the menusha that comes to mind. I created Alt-Thinkining for those who have an interest in my political and social side and who might be appauled or offended by My more carnal thoughts (I love My carnal thoughts ).

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Dominant

I am a dominant man. I am just that. I am not dominant because of any superiority on my part. Not because I feel I am more intelligent,or wiser. I do not dominate because of the strength or mass of my body. I am not, nor would I want to be dominant with all women. Yet to you, I am Master.



I am your Master only after earning your trust and and embracing your submissiveness. I have looked into your heart and mind and clearly see your desires and passions. You have thrown away your fears and inhibitions. You tell me of the needs of your heart and body. You have given me total access to your soul, and I accept the responsibility and honor.



You are a woman. You are not weak and inferior because of it. You are a treasure to be cherished. We are not equal. I have the strength of body and mind, and the instinctive need to protect, possess, defend, and provide for you. You are a woman and instinctively stronger of will and heart. Your belief in me gives me courage and direction. Your strength disperses my doubt. Your needs and desires encourage and give purpose to my efforts.



We are not equal. We are halves of a whole. We compliment each other and make each other complete. My desire to dominate you is instinctive. It is not to degrade you nor is it degrading to you because you are secure in being totally feminine. We recognize and accept our worth, and our need for someone to trust and fulfill our needs.



You are sure, strong and proud in your womanhood. You do not submit as acceptance of inferiority, but from strength and passion. You expect a man to stand strong and be a man. You desire and flourish in the strength and control of a man. In return you present the control of your body, unqualified trust and honesty and the faithfulness of your heart.



You submit because I have earned your trust. Because I have opened my heart and soul to you. Because I have listened to your words with my ears and heart and have learned to anticipate your needs and emotions. And because I have proven worthy in your eyes, you have given me the only true treasure of life; You have given me dominance over you.



What you give is not abnormal, but pure, natural and the rarest gift a woman can give a man. You have given me complete and unshakable assurance of your commitment to me. Your submissiveness is a magnificent gift and sacred responsibility. I accept this from you with humility and joy. I understand the rarity and purity of this gift. I recognize it is your body and soul, your heart and mind.

I dominate only because you have allowed me too and when I see you kneel before me, in my mind and heart, you are raised above all other women, and all the treasures on the earth. What you give freely cannot in reality be bought.

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And From a Submissive Woman

I find pleasure, joy, and fulfillment from being submissive to another in a loving relationship. I am not weak, or stupid. I am a strong woman, with firm views and a clear concept of what I want out of my life. I do not serve out of shame or weakness, but out of pride and strength. I look to my loving Master for guidance and protection, for never am I more complete than when he is with me. I know that he will protect my body, my mind, and my soul with his strength and wisdom.

He is everything to me, as I am everything to him. His touch awakens me and his thoughts free me. Only in serving him do I find complete freedom and joy. His punishments are harsh, but I accept them thankfully, knowing that he has my best interests always foremost in his mind. If he desires my body for pleasure, I shall joyfully give it to him, and take pleasure myself from knowing that I have brought him happiness. However, the pleasure of the flesh is but one facet of any relationship. The love, the trust and sharing, the words spoken and felt, those are all parts of this relationship.

My body is his, and if he says I am beautiful, then I am. No matter what I look like to others, I am beautiful in his eyes, and because of that I hold my head high... .. for who can tell me that my Master is wrong in seeing the beauty in me? If he says I am his princess, then I am that...regal and graceful. And if I see laughter at me in the eyes of others, I do not recognize it, for who are they to call my Master wrong?

If he says I am his toy, his slut, his tramp, then I am that...as wanton and dirty as he wants me to be, and if others do not see this, then it is they who are blind, not my Master. My mind is his, to expand, to explore, to know as only he can. I have no secrets from him...for secrets are a thing that would keep me from being more perfectly his. Secrets would put a wall up between my Master and myself...and I do not want walls.

His lessons are not always ones I would seek on my own, but they are lessons he has decided I need, and so I learn from him. My soul is his, as bare to his touch as ever my skin could be when I kneel naked at his feet. Never a moment goes by when I do not feel his presence, be he miles away or standing over me.

I spend my days knowing that the energy and thought he puts into our relationship is as much for my benefit as for his, and look forward to each lovingly crafted scene that we do together.

His part is much harder than mine, and I know this and am grateful that he cares enough about me to spend his time and energy so freely on me. I have the easier job: to feel, to experience, to let myself go and abandon everything to him. I am his pleasure and his responsibility, and he takes both seriously. I am a submissive woman. I am proud to call myself that. My submission is a gift that I do not give lightly, and can only be given to one who can appreciate that gift and return it tenfold.

Only to he who has that strength will I give myself fully, because I am strong and proud.

I am a submissive woman.


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"For women the best aphrodisiacs are words,
The G-spot is in the ears"~Isabel Allende



Things I Had To Hide
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Long Stories

(Series)

Shaking the Family Tree Chapter I
Shaking the Family Tree Chapter II
Shaking the Family Tree Chapter III
Shaking the Family Tree Chapter IV
Shaking the Family Tree Chapter V
Shaking the Family Tree -The Music Lover

Conjuring Adonis I
Conjuring Adonis II
Conjuring Adonis III
Conjuring Adonis IV

Dream Lover I
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Vlad's Lesson Plan
Vlad's Next Semester
Vlad's Final Lesson
Vlad's Beginning
Vlad's Resurrection Part 1
Vlad's Resurrection Part II

The Libertine of Libby Part 1
The Libertine of Libby Part 2
The Libertine of Libby Part 3
The Libertine of Libby Part 4
The Tawdry Tale of Tommy Two Tongues Part 1
The Tawdry Tale of Tommy Two Tongues Part 2
The Tawdry Tale of Tommy Two Tongues Part 3
The Libertine of Libby Part 5
The Libertine of Libby Part 6
The Libertine of Libby Part 7
The Libertine of Libby Part 8
The Libertine of Libby Part 9
The Libertine of Libby Part 10 (Last Chapter)

j's Seduction
j's Objectification
Recreating j
Educating j

The Photo Shoot Part 1
The Photo Shoot Part 2

Electra's Story Part 1
Electra's Story Part 2

Sunday's Child Part 1

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The Book
Dessert
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I Cum In Peace
Biting My Way Into The New Year
Her Master's Test
Off White, Six Defective Doms and One Pathetic Troll
Going Postal
StepfordSlaves
Liberation
The New Year's Party

Nocturnal Events
Nocturnal Emissions
Death
Love's Garden
Patty On A Leash/Re-written
To Confess or Not To confess
Binding of Kay
Raising Bella Donna
One Last Good-bye
Spare the Rod, Spoil the Sub
Stella In The Stacks
Red Rain
Misjudged
Breakfast With A Twist
Mon Couer's Papillon (My Heart's Butterfly)
When Daddy's Girl is Bad
The Sitter, The Voyeur and Graduation Day
Please Don't Hurt Me
Cumalot or Knights In Tarnished Armor
Her Halloween Date
His Voice
Life's Little Ironies
The Gift
My Slut ester
Beads
Playing With Toyosi
The Slave Auction
#9 - A Detective Story

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Puppy Love
Cunniliguis As A Religious Rite
Players, Pretenders and Abusers
Edgeplay and the Knife
My Youth
Submission
BDSM Website Security
Pain
On Missing Play
Beads a Semi-Fictional Account
Playing With Toyosi or How To Torture A Scammer
Hospital Stories


Photo Interpretations
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La Image'
La Image' II
The Shower
Lips
My Toy
Waiting
Daddy's Girl
Blossom
Chocolate and Roses
Special Delivery
Waiting II
Orgasm
Edge Play
Cocktails
This Flesh
Smoke
Eve
Illusion
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Passion
Watching
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Intimacy
Tango 2
Inside of You
Dreamscape
Demons
Despair
Spent
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His Flower
Her Grief

Poetry of a sort
(very little rhymes)

Tango
Shadows
Faded Words on Yellowing Paper
I Was
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Bound
Ladies of the Night





Bedtime Stories
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My Love Fable
Pond of Sorrow and Tears
The Journey


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Extreme Body Modification
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